Thank god finally
Why is every single one of you tagging this saying "oh just like horseshoe crabs" why the hell do you all know how horseshoe crabs mate off the top of your heads?
What the fuck do you mean "because of the lesbian horseshoe crabs"
Love that his reaction to being pranked was to pull the exact same prank on his buddy
ableists are like “elton john has a cane now oh no how sad” as if it doesn’t make him even cooler and sexier and better than all of you. piss off
Do you KNOW how much flamboyance you can contain in one cane? SO MUCH. Maybe he’ll be responsible for creating more cane fashion than ever previously imagined
(via @princepestilence )
A lot of people have talked about Benoit Blanc’s accent. Was he always going to sound like that, was that in the original script?
Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me.
I know there is a lot of discourse (tm) around this right now but listen to me
sometimes you do just have to lie to children.
If, when my toddler is, you know, toddling around saying “mama? Big ball?”
If I were lean down and say “unfortunately the big beach ball for some reason fills you with such an unadulterated rage that is beyond human comprehension that you scream until you pass out, so mama had to remove the beach ball from the premises until you can better regulate your emotions” she would simply stare at me like I had 3 heads full of equal betrayal.
So, for now, instead “big ball went night night!”
Please understand when I say “removed the ball from the premises” I mean I popped it in a fit of exhausted confusion. I murdered the beach ball.
See I’ve lied to you all too and it was better this way.
you can’t just leave this in the tags etc.
You can’t be funnier then me on my own posts, I’m in tears from laughter
